Thursday, 7 May 2015

Legs Bum Tum...Torture

Yesterday I made the catastrophic mistake of going to an exercise class. I was in a wee bit of a shmood so I decided to do some exercise and get those endorphins going. If any of you are ever in the same situation then I urge you to go on a jog or do a Pilates video on youtube. DO. NOT. GO. TO. A. CLASS.

It was one of the most embarrassing things I've ever done (even worse that that time my Classics teacher exposed me to the class for doing extra work...I know I'm a loser!). I basically paid to be bullied. The class started with this thing called "Circuits", where we had to run around the room in a circle for what felt like a gazillion years. After two laps I was exhausted and ignored the leader who was yelling at us to "RUN GIRLS RUN" and decided instead to go into a brisk walk. I actually held up the people behind people and there was a mahoosive gap between me and the girls in front...

Then we had to get some chairs and mats out and I thought 'Oh yay, this will be the bit where we have a 20 minute break and chat about Britain's Got Talent, preferably whilst eating some Digestives'. But alas, no. We had to do push ups on the chairs and these things called planks...
It got so bad that I laid down on my mat and stayed still like a star fish. Oh God but the worst moment was when I was in my Dead Starfish position and then turned to the girl net to me, who was all red and puffy so I thought she was a fellow Exercise Victim, and I said "Oh my God, this is so hard! I can't go on!" and she smiled and said "Oh, no this one is actually really easy - just lift your hips like this". It wasn't easy. That position was as hard as licking your toenails (don't try that at home though, kids).

So I left this LBT class amidst loads of girls saying "Oh my God, that was great. I really felt that burn" whilst inwardly screaming "I BURN ALL OVER. IT WASN'T A GOOD THING".

The only good thing to come out of it was that I think I actually glowed afterwards. OK, but that was definitely sweat-induced...

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