Thursday 31 October 2013

The Kinky Question...

OK, guys. It's finally happened. I've found someone who meets all of my silly criteria and we met up yesterday which was so fun. We went to Notting Hill and it was just so pretty and aaahhhhhh.
We get along so well and we were laughing and, ah... Humbug/Cutie is just fabbity fantabulous.
BUT
How do I phrase this...
I sit next to Humbug's best friend in French and he thinks that I - the nun called Grammar Gals - am "kinky". As in, 50 Shades Of Grey handcuff-me-sir-let's-have-a-spanking-time.
HOW?!
You guys know I am about as sexual as a donner kebab covered in milk and scattered in almonds. It's just not something I would describe myself as.
But it's not like he called me 'sexual'. He called me 'kinky'. And according to Bazz I give off a kinky vibe. This perplexes me because the last time I checked I don't
A. Carry around handcuffs and ask people to "arrest me".
B. Own or wish to own a whip.
C. Have a cute maids-outfit. OK, I have lingerie. But that doesn't count...

Although...
Well, I'm open to costumes to be honest.
THIS DOES NOT MAKE ME KINKY.
This makes me...inventive?
Oh, I don't know. Don't judge my life.
Anyways, things are going really well with Humbug even though last weekend I got completely drunk and left a text on his phone which read: "Oh oh oh mysterious 'biu' I wanna get close to youuuuu". Yes, I'm surprised that he is still dating me, too. I was at lunch with him yesterday and he whipped out his phone and showed me a voicemail where I called him "soo fucking hot" and then proceeded to rabbit on about how I was a "drunk skunk, like OMG soooooo drunk".
So, I'm moving to Antartica.
Keep you posted!
xxx

Saturday 19 October 2013

The Social Hermit

I think it's been established by all who know me that I'm not a normal teen. Firstly, there's the fact that when I was at Reading Festival a part of me really missed my books. Then there's the fact that my idea of a rave is colour-coding my post-its whilst rapping along to Eminem. And now there's the fact that I'm becoming a Social Hermit who lives in Social Siberia.
It all started when I missed a party 2 weeks ago. Just one party. I was behind on my work and I decided to work through Friday night and therefore miss the drunken antics that were undoubtedly waiting for me. Then last weekend I claimed I was also "busy" and, again, I missed the opportunity to be a Drunk Skunk. Then there's my friend's gathering tonight, which I'm missing because of a "family thing", which translates into me wearing my "24 Reasons Chocolate in Better than Sex" T-shirt and doing my French homework.
OK...so I'm a freak?!
It's OK, I'm thinking it too! I am voluntarily a Sober Cobra and thus missing out on teenage drunkenness. I promise that this madness shall stop soon - it's just a stressful time with Oxford prep around the corner!

But now that I'm dating Cutie I think that there is little chance that I'll remain a Social Hermit forever because he likes doing this crazy thing called 'socialising'. He is a normal teenage boy who thinks the library is a mythical place in a faraway kingdom. Things are actually going amazingly well with Cutie (aka Humbug) and our date last weekend was adorable; we went to the park and we went to a maze and the kiss was fabulissimo.
After all of the Manwhores and Knobheads I've finally found a Hottie with a Heart.
Sighhhhhhhh.
I can still sense your judgement at my social seclusion but, rest assured, I am visiting my sister in Durham next weekend so I doubt that being a Sober Cobra will be an option ;)
Keep you posted,
Grammar Gal

Thursday 17 October 2013

Turning over a new leaf

Ok, soooo much has changed since I last wrote here:
A. I found out that almost my entire school year has read my blog, including all of the male characters mentioned
B. Funny Guy and I have finally quasi-made up
C. I'm now dating Cutie - the boy who I had a crush on last year :')
D. Funny Guy and I are just friends now
E. I've decided to restart the blog but to make it less bitchy and vindictive and more happy and less personal :D

So with this new mantra I'm reloading Grammar Gal :)
As I already said, I'm dating a super-cute boy at my school and everything is going splendidly! : he is cute, he's charming, he's funny and we get along really well.
It's fabulissimo! So, technically, I'm not a 'convent gal' and my new URL is totally inappropriate but everyone knew my other one (literally, everyone!) so I'm in Blogging Exile on this hidden blog :')
Keep you posted on any new developments and I'm happy to be writing again, chums
Grammar gal xxxx