I am an awful person. A horrendous human being who deserves to have things thrown at her in the streets.
I kissed Curly-Haired boy despite my telling my friend-who-has-got-with-him-three-time's best friend that I would never kiss Curly-Haired Boy because it breaks Girl Code.
SO WHY DID I DO IT?
Well. There are 4 main reasons:
1. I was drunk. As in, Vodka became my new best friend.
2. It was a romantic moment: he told me he usually gets with girls he doesn't really like but now he's changed.
3. We were getting on so well, that it felt natural at the time; I got a bit swept away by him. He listened to me when I talked about how Knight broke my heart, and how Creepy David was the worst experience of my life.
4. He was persuasive - he told me that my friend wouldn't mind because she was over him.
We were in a room by ourselves when it happened.
I won't lie, the kiss was good. It was tender and the opposite to Tree's forceful nature, and Shy Guy's Washing Machine technique. He also kissed my neck, my cheek and my forehead and it was cute. If I'm honest, I totally forgot where I was, the fact he is Strictly Off Limits and the fact that the doors were glass, so everyone could see us. Including the friend's best friend.
After Curly-Haired Guy left, my friend's best friend took me to the side and shouted at me.
She called me sly, a hypocrite and a bitch. She said I should never have kissed him and it broke girl code. She was so angry with me. I could feel the hatred, and she kept saying that she was just defending her best friend. It was then that I realised how ATROCIOUSLY I had behaved. I had kissed a boy who my friend liked, which breaks girl code and is not at all OK. I apolofied profusely, but she kept shouting so I ended up crying (I'm just a massive sissy when I'm drunk/hormonal/hated).
One of my close friends took me for a walk and calmed me down, but it's still hanging over my head as I type this now. I talked to my friend last night (the one who had got with Curly Haired Guy 3 times) and she was disappointed with me (I could tell from her tone) and she seemed rightfully upset.
I texted both her and her best friend 2 long texts apologising and telling them how much I hate myself for what I did. My friend texted me back saying she was disappointed and surprised but she wants us to move on.
Her best friend has not replied, and has tweeted about how it was"havoc". I hate it when people hate me, but it's well-deserved here.
So, I've concluded, to swap boys for books and to leave the party scene for a while. Tomorrow I'm going to just stay in the library all day because
1. I'm ashamed of my actions
2. I want to avoid the awkwardness there would be at lunch if I sat with my friend and her best friend
3. I want to avoid Social Siberia which I fear is waiting for me at school - a.k.a. total exclusion and bitchy comments.
Last night was the worst night of my life (it even surpasses Creepy David) but I suppose things can only get better.
Keep you posted,
Grammar Gal xxx