Wednesday, 26 December 2012

Let's Get Toned

It's difficult to pin-point the moment that I realised I need to go to the Gym more often.
Perhaps it was when my new friend, Sporty, told me that she goes to the gym 2-3 times a week and then plays football on Saturdays.
Perhaps it was when I was shopping with one of my closest friends and I was about to buy her a size 8 skirt when she saw a size 6 one and insisted I buy her that one because it would "fit her better".
The only thing a size 6 skirt would be good for, for me, is a lampshade. Or a scarf. Or a hat. (you get the picture - it would not fit over my rather sizable bottom and thighs)
And so I've decided to take a leap - a leap to the gym.
The gym is a magical place where gorgeous boys and girls run in a frolicking and cool fashion. This new species of people - The Gymmies - never get tired of exercising. When asked whether they would like to go to McDonalds they faint in disgust.
I cannot lie to you. I could never be like those Gymmies. For starters, when I run and get sweaty I do not look like something out of Baywatch. Instead, I call it Sweaty Betty Syndrome - the symptoms of which are red cheeks (which are not flushed pink and do not give you a beautiful glow - they are beetroot red and make you looks as if someone has clobbered you on both sides. Using a mallet.), puffy smoker-running-up-the-stairs breath, and unattractive sweatiness where your clothes stick to you...
However, I shall be a Gymmie-in-training - an intern in the Gymmie world, if you will
For those of you who have read this blog for a long time, you will remember that I tried this before (I tried to be a Gym Goddess and was slightly successful - I walked a total of 6 miles, I think it was). But this time I'm going to actually commit.

I also need to clarify that I'm not trying to become a stick insect (i.e. the size 6 friend). I am merely trying to "tone" myself. It's that time of year where one's belly feels ready to pop from all the turkey/chocolate log/cold chicken/christmas pudding/other edible goodies... So it's only natural for a gal to want to tone!

Keep you posted,
And Happy Boxing Day, chums
Grammar Gal xxx

P.S. I had an awful daydream that my driving instructor said "teaching you to use the gear-stick is going to be hard" and I said "is that a euphemism?" and I completely cocked up our Drivationship (driving relationship). But now I've told you it can't happen (it's a rule) - right...?!

NB: This Toning Regime (of going to the gym at least once a fortnight and eating 3 pieces of fruit a day instead of a month) shall commence in the New Year - right now it's still Christmas Season (or close enough...)

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