Thursday, 5 February 2015

Being Cool isn't Cool

Today I turned up to a seminar in dungarees with greasy hair scraped into pigtails. Yes, I looked like a farmer who had fallen into a bush on the way to milk Daisy the cow. But the thing is, that even though the 'cool' girls in my class stared at me and clearly thought I was a capital L 'Loser', I didn't really care - I like dressing how I dress and acting like I'm 12 because it's just who I am and it makes me happy!!
Happiness is way cooler than wearer leather jackets and (god forbid) make-up.
Having said that, I was an actual mess today. The reason is that I overslept (classic) so didn't technically have time to get washed. I'm rather ashamed of what I did...
OK, before I tell you I have to defend myself. In Geography GCSE my teacher told me - he SWORE DOWN - that toilet water is 100000% clean and actually drinkable.
I was stressing. I turned up to my seminar smelling like a stray dog and I knew I couldn't go into my seminar with the pigtails, dungarees AND grim smell. I had to do something. But the toilets were rammed full with more cool people (why do so many cool kids do English?) so...
I'm just going to type it really fast and if you judge me then that's totally cool because I judge me too...I used a tiny bit (REALLY TINY) of toilet water to wash under my arms.
I KNOW I'M A GRIM HUMAN. Seriously, how do I have a boyfriend when I act like I'm from Planet of the Apes (OK, I've never actually seen that film but it's something about creepy monkeys)
But aside from Dubious Hygeine Measures, I think that being weird is totally fun. In fact, I've always said that I can tell a date is going well if the guy says I'm "really weird" - it means he thinks I'm cool (this is totally a lie my mum told me to comfort me after many a disastrous date, but it works!).
 The first time I met my boyfriend's best friend I was told that I needed to "act cool" because the guy was "really cool". My boyfriend (let's call him Melon to make things easier) said that I should "just not be myself". I tried - really I did. But as soon as I saw his friend I ran and gave him a hug and then had Verbal Vomit - where I just say everything that comes into my head.
But Melon was wrong - his best friend found my kooky (in a good way) so #winning.
The moral of this story, chums, is that you should never try to be "cool" - it's so overrated. On a night out, who looks like they're having more fun: the girls who are dancing sexily and swooshing their hips around OR the girls who are jumping around with air guitars? Yep, the latter.
Being weird is a gift so use it wisely, girls.
Keep you posted,
Grammar Gal

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