Hello chums,
In the end Z didn't show up at the bus stop because he's been getting an earlier bus but I think it's for the best!
See, at present moment, I don't like him. It's not just that I don't fancy him, I genuinely am not too keen on him as a person at this moment in time.
Though I wouldn't call myself fussy, I do have a list of Flaws that I cannot stand in a boy:
1. If he's a wimp.
2. If he's self-obsessed/vain.
3. If he doesn't listen.
4. If he listens to screamo music.
5. If he has The Z Flaw.
The Z Flaw is, funnily enough, Z's major flaw: shallowness. He only goes for thin, pretty/"fitt" and "not serious" girls, and believes that good girls are "frigid" and "boring".
And so, alas, I cannot be fucked to continue trying to be friends with Z.
There's more to a girl than whether she'll have sex with you and if a guy cannot see that then he can just join the line of Knobheads that I know.
This line has grown so long that I've decided to take my mother's advice and just leave boys alone for a while...
Keep you posted when that fails,
Grammar Gal
P.S. Today the lads at my corner shop (a.k.a. my Red Bull dealers) asked me what my plans were for the weekend and when I said "working" they assumed I had a job. So I lied and said I have an interview at "a little bookshop in West Wickham". There are no bookshops in West Wickham. I am a terrible liar but I must keep this up now....
How do I get myself into these situations?!
Friday, 30 November 2012
Wednesday, 28 November 2012
White Flag
I cannot do this.
I cannot pursue a boy who is so far out of my league that we're practically on different planets.
It's too cringeworthy.
Instead Z and I shall be friends.
I'm seeing him tomorrow and we've agreed that I'll talk to him in the morning :O
We'll see...
Tonight I saw a play called Spring Awakening and it was beyond weird. At one stage the actor started touching himself while sitting next to me. Beyond awkward.
Oh yes and I sat on a man's head by accident whilst looking for my purse...
Pretty standard evening in total.
Keep you posted on the Z dilemma tomorrow,
Grammar Gal xxx
I cannot pursue a boy who is so far out of my league that we're practically on different planets.
It's too cringeworthy.
Instead Z and I shall be friends.
I'm seeing him tomorrow and we've agreed that I'll talk to him in the morning :O
We'll see...
Tonight I saw a play called Spring Awakening and it was beyond weird. At one stage the actor started touching himself while sitting next to me. Beyond awkward.
Oh yes and I sat on a man's head by accident whilst looking for my purse...
Pretty standard evening in total.
Keep you posted on the Z dilemma tomorrow,
Grammar Gal xxx
Tuesday, 27 November 2012
Some Kissing Home Truths
I'm a terrible person.
Over the past week I have repeatedly insulted Tree and his inability to kiss well, to some of the other girls he has kissed.
And then I talk to him at school.
Gosh that's horrible, isn't it?
I'm not trying to be mean but Tree is a good talking point for these girls and, one cannot deny, that he was pretty bad.
And then things became worse today when I laughed at him in his face because he has "wet hair" but actually...he'd just had a haircut.
I know. I cringe at my awfulness.
And to make things better I've decided to dedicate a blog-post to my cock-ups in the world of kissing so that we can accept that Tree probably isn't as bad as I am:
1. With Shy Guy I wrapped one leg around his. As in, we were dancing and I randomly put one leg around his, for no apparent reason. I am an official weirdo.
2. With Tree I licked his neck. I've already mentioned this but I still cringe with horror at the memory of it.
3. With Tree I narrated throughout the kiss. Not exactly attractve, right?
Think that is about everything, but I'm probably a bad kisser too. But, alas I'll never know because the boys I've been with (Shy Guy a.k.a. Washing Machine Kisser, Dan a.k.a. Leglessly Drunk, Tree a.k.a. Teethy and Overpowering) have also been pretty bad.
So I'll never know!
But one thing is for certain: I need to stop being mean to Tree.
And I need to cheer up - I've been down in the dumps lately for reasons unknown. Perhaps it's the realisation that Z and I are just friends and always shall be, or perhaps it's the fact that I'm starting to forget about Knight which, naturally, frightens me.
Anyways, I have a party next weekend and Bazz and I are going to be top wingwomen and it should be fun Let's just hope there are not Trees or Loverats or Shyguy equivalents there...:')
Keep you posted,
Grammar Gal
Over the past week I have repeatedly insulted Tree and his inability to kiss well, to some of the other girls he has kissed.
And then I talk to him at school.
Gosh that's horrible, isn't it?
I'm not trying to be mean but Tree is a good talking point for these girls and, one cannot deny, that he was pretty bad.
And then things became worse today when I laughed at him in his face because he has "wet hair" but actually...he'd just had a haircut.
I know. I cringe at my awfulness.
And to make things better I've decided to dedicate a blog-post to my cock-ups in the world of kissing so that we can accept that Tree probably isn't as bad as I am:
1. With Shy Guy I wrapped one leg around his. As in, we were dancing and I randomly put one leg around his, for no apparent reason. I am an official weirdo.
2. With Tree I licked his neck. I've already mentioned this but I still cringe with horror at the memory of it.
3. With Tree I narrated throughout the kiss. Not exactly attractve, right?
Think that is about everything, but I'm probably a bad kisser too. But, alas I'll never know because the boys I've been with (Shy Guy a.k.a. Washing Machine Kisser, Dan a.k.a. Leglessly Drunk, Tree a.k.a. Teethy and Overpowering) have also been pretty bad.
So I'll never know!
But one thing is for certain: I need to stop being mean to Tree.
And I need to cheer up - I've been down in the dumps lately for reasons unknown. Perhaps it's the realisation that Z and I are just friends and always shall be, or perhaps it's the fact that I'm starting to forget about Knight which, naturally, frightens me.
Anyways, I have a party next weekend and Bazz and I are going to be top wingwomen and it should be fun Let's just hope there are not Trees or Loverats or Shyguy equivalents there...:')
Keep you posted,
Grammar Gal
Sunday, 25 November 2012
Last night Z cringe
Hello chums,
Last night I went to the gathering of one of my new school-friends.
My evening didn't get off to a good start: I had forgotten to wash my hair and only realised 15 minutes before I had to leave so I tried straightening the grease out, but to no avail. I had to Dry-Shampoo it.
The Dry-Shampooing was going well, until I hit The Dry-Shampoo Wall where I had put too much in and my hair was sticky and if I picked up a strand of hair it stayed levitated...
Other than my hair mishap the night was amazing!
There were just a few of us and we played Ring of Fire, Get of The Bus, and Spoons (All drinking games) and, through abstaining from straight vodka I had an amazing time and got sufficiently drunk on Vodka + Coke but not enough to be sick as a brick :')
I talked to Z, too.
I'm cringing.
This was the most memorable part of our conversation:
Me: Don't fall asleep at 9 tonight, jah?
Him: It's already past 9 so if I manage that I'd be really impressed ;)
Me: Oh, it's cool, you can borrow my tardis
Him: Only if you come inside with me
Me: Of course I will jeez. Hey, is that a euphemism?
MY GOD WHY WOULD I SAY THAT. I BLAME THE VODKA AND ARGHHH.
IT GETS WORSE
Him: Hahaha no I've never been in one before, you need to teach me.
I know. I'm still cringing now.
And I also told him, later on: "you're so cocky that you're practically a phallus" and then had to explain that a phallus is a dick :')
Oh dear.
Keep posted,
Grammar Gal
Last night I went to the gathering of one of my new school-friends.
My evening didn't get off to a good start: I had forgotten to wash my hair and only realised 15 minutes before I had to leave so I tried straightening the grease out, but to no avail. I had to Dry-Shampoo it.
The Dry-Shampooing was going well, until I hit The Dry-Shampoo Wall where I had put too much in and my hair was sticky and if I picked up a strand of hair it stayed levitated...
Other than my hair mishap the night was amazing!
There were just a few of us and we played Ring of Fire, Get of The Bus, and Spoons (All drinking games) and, through abstaining from straight vodka I had an amazing time and got sufficiently drunk on Vodka + Coke but not enough to be sick as a brick :')
I talked to Z, too.
I'm cringing.
This was the most memorable part of our conversation:
Me: Don't fall asleep at 9 tonight, jah?
Him: It's already past 9 so if I manage that I'd be really impressed ;)
Me: Oh, it's cool, you can borrow my tardis
Him: Only if you come inside with me
Me: Of course I will jeez. Hey, is that a euphemism?
MY GOD WHY WOULD I SAY THAT. I BLAME THE VODKA AND ARGHHH.
IT GETS WORSE
Him: Hahaha no I've never been in one before, you need to teach me.
I know. I'm still cringing now.
And I also told him, later on: "you're so cocky that you're practically a phallus" and then had to explain that a phallus is a dick :')
Oh dear.
Keep posted,
Grammar Gal
Friday, 23 November 2012
Game On
We appear to have a slight situation.
Once again I have the teensiest crush on a Player who is rumoured to be a loverat.
There is no way that I can "get" him through being honest about how I feel because, as previously discovered, telling guys how you feel
A. Turns them off (Knight)
B. Intimidates them (Prince - although I only asked him out I was so forward that he never replied...)
Therefore the gloves are coming off.
It's been a while since I've played the field in this way - you forget about all the 'dos and donts'.
DO:
- Look your best whenever you see him
- Go out and take pictures of your outing
- Tell him when you're going out
- Flirt (this has always been tricky for me)
DON'T:
- Drunk text him
- Text him back straightaway
- Call him to "see how he is"
- Appear too desperate with the flirting thing/appear too eager in general.
And it is with these rules that I'm going to treat Z.
Yes, I'm afraid I'm now on the Z-waggon because it's nice to like someone even if they're out of your league.
I was going to play it casual with Z and stay fiends and see if he made a move (Actually, let's keep this as Plan B) but tonight, at a girly night in with some new school friends, I found out that he is a Player.
I say this because he plays a game.
He takes each drunken girl he's with to "go look at the park" or "go see the pond" and then kisses them.
This was brand new information for me; I didn't know he had a formula and strategy. I didn't know he got with so many girls (and I also didn't know that he's a "good" kisser - quite a contrast to Tree apparently!) So now I'm going back to my strategies, because if I don't then he shall either
1. Friend-zone me forever
2. Forget me
3. Love me and Leave me like many girls before me.
Let the games begin...
Once again I have the teensiest crush on a Player who is rumoured to be a loverat.
There is no way that I can "get" him through being honest about how I feel because, as previously discovered, telling guys how you feel
A. Turns them off (Knight)
B. Intimidates them (Prince - although I only asked him out I was so forward that he never replied...)
Therefore the gloves are coming off.
It's been a while since I've played the field in this way - you forget about all the 'dos and donts'.
DO:
- Look your best whenever you see him
- Go out and take pictures of your outing
- Tell him when you're going out
- Flirt (this has always been tricky for me)
DON'T:
- Drunk text him
- Text him back straightaway
- Call him to "see how he is"
- Appear too desperate with the flirting thing/appear too eager in general.
And it is with these rules that I'm going to treat Z.
Yes, I'm afraid I'm now on the Z-waggon because it's nice to like someone even if they're out of your league.
I was going to play it casual with Z and stay fiends and see if he made a move (Actually, let's keep this as Plan B) but tonight, at a girly night in with some new school friends, I found out that he is a Player.
I say this because he plays a game.
He takes each drunken girl he's with to "go look at the park" or "go see the pond" and then kisses them.
This was brand new information for me; I didn't know he had a formula and strategy. I didn't know he got with so many girls (and I also didn't know that he's a "good" kisser - quite a contrast to Tree apparently!) So now I'm going back to my strategies, because if I don't then he shall either
1. Friend-zone me forever
2. Forget me
3. Love me and Leave me like many girls before me.
Let the games begin...
Tuesday, 20 November 2012
Exception & The Rule
In the case that you haven't watched He's Just Not that Into You I feel I should give you the low-down.
The Rule is...the rule. It's the general way things are in a relationship. Here are some rules that I thought I was The Exception to:
A. You can't get off with a boy and then date him. EXCEPTION: a couple at my school got off together and now they're dating. I AM THE RULE: Awkwardly running away from Tree at school after we got together at Halloween. If a boy gets with you at a party and this is the first time he's met you he will probably Love You And Leave You.
B. You can't ask a boy out. EXCEPTION - In every film you watch the girl asks the guy out and he says 'yes' and they hit it off - i.e. Sleepless in Seattle. RULE - When I asked out Prince he didn't reply. Asking out the guy will intimidate him and make you look too eager.
C. It is difficult/impossible to date your best boy friend successfully. EXCEPTION - Films like Perks of Being a Wallflower, or a couple at my school who were friends first or Monica and Chandler in Friends. RULE - Knight and I failed. Disastrously. It's bloody difficult to go from friends to more-than-friends but if you're both in the right place at the right time it can work.
D. You cannot rekindle a love/be friends with an ex when the boy has a girlfriend. EXCEPTION - When Edward gets back with Bella in New Moon when she's practically with Jacob. RULE - My failed attempt to start talking to Knight again which resulted in him changing his relationship status to "is in a relationship with [Enter his girlfriend's name]" and then he commented and said "just in case it weren't clear". Eurgh. When he has a girlfriend he is not looking for any reminders of his past and he's not looking for another love interest. So give up.
E. Boys will not give you their coat if you're chilly. EXCEPTION - E-v-e-r-y single chick flick & Giraffe and his old girlfriend, the Ladybird (these are nicknames from aaaages ago - 4 years!!) RULE - When I told Knight I was feeling chilly he gave me a hug but no jacket was offered. If you're cold then he'd probably cold too so he will not want to give you his coat. End of.
Think that sums up most of this stuff,
Keep you posted,
Grammar Gal xxx
P.S. Z said he likes "good girls" but finds them too "frigid"... And the verdict is...? Bazz reckons he's just being a normal teenage boy but....the jury's out for me. Do I want to be with a guy that objectifies women by these standards?
But, then, he's so cute and lovely.
Grrrr...
The Rule is...the rule. It's the general way things are in a relationship. Here are some rules that I thought I was The Exception to:
A. You can't get off with a boy and then date him. EXCEPTION: a couple at my school got off together and now they're dating. I AM THE RULE: Awkwardly running away from Tree at school after we got together at Halloween. If a boy gets with you at a party and this is the first time he's met you he will probably Love You And Leave You.
B. You can't ask a boy out. EXCEPTION - In every film you watch the girl asks the guy out and he says 'yes' and they hit it off - i.e. Sleepless in Seattle. RULE - When I asked out Prince he didn't reply. Asking out the guy will intimidate him and make you look too eager.
C. It is difficult/impossible to date your best boy friend successfully. EXCEPTION - Films like Perks of Being a Wallflower, or a couple at my school who were friends first or Monica and Chandler in Friends. RULE - Knight and I failed. Disastrously. It's bloody difficult to go from friends to more-than-friends but if you're both in the right place at the right time it can work.
D. You cannot rekindle a love/be friends with an ex when the boy has a girlfriend. EXCEPTION - When Edward gets back with Bella in New Moon when she's practically with Jacob. RULE - My failed attempt to start talking to Knight again which resulted in him changing his relationship status to "is in a relationship with [Enter his girlfriend's name]" and then he commented and said "just in case it weren't clear". Eurgh. When he has a girlfriend he is not looking for any reminders of his past and he's not looking for another love interest. So give up.
E. Boys will not give you their coat if you're chilly. EXCEPTION - E-v-e-r-y single chick flick & Giraffe and his old girlfriend, the Ladybird (these are nicknames from aaaages ago - 4 years!!) RULE - When I told Knight I was feeling chilly he gave me a hug but no jacket was offered. If you're cold then he'd probably cold too so he will not want to give you his coat. End of.
Think that sums up most of this stuff,
Keep you posted,
Grammar Gal xxx
P.S. Z said he likes "good girls" but finds them too "frigid"... And the verdict is...? Bazz reckons he's just being a normal teenage boy but....the jury's out for me. Do I want to be with a guy that objectifies women by these standards?
But, then, he's so cute and lovely.
Grrrr...
Sunday, 18 November 2012
Snapped out of it
Over the last couple of days I've been moping over Knight; what I did wrong, whether I could fix it, why he started ignoring me etc...
I blame this on my mother who got into a deep conversation with me about it, claiming that I "broke his heart" so it's only natural that he'd ignore me.
Bullshit!
I didn't break his heart - as Bazz said: he's a guy and he's a prick.
Of course I didn't make this realisation until this morning and now it's too late
Yesterday, moping in self-pity, I sent a message to Knight, which he saw (according to Facebook) and has not replied to. Fuck my life! And now I don't feel sad because I've converted my sadness to mild annoyance verging on a "fuck you" attitude.
This is a good thing, because now I'm feeling soooo much better.
What brought on this realisation? The fact that Knight just put up pictures of him and his girlfriend. And now I realise he's happy with his girlfriend, I don't want him to split from her and I don't want him anymore; I'm sick of chasing someone that's not chasing me!
And, on that note, I'm going to show you the message I sent.
I am cringing as I copy and paste this so don't judge me. Or if you do then pity my foolishness:
I have a theory that in December the world's going to get hit by a massive meteorite sent from aliens and everything's gonna get blown up (unless my tardis starts working or the Japanese make some ships to save us like they do in 2012).
Anyway, in the case that I don't get on one of these ships and we're hit by a meteorite there is something Id like to know or it will just bug me forever: why did you say you loved me, then you ignored me, and then you got a girlfriend? There's no hard feelings don't worry (: I'd just like to know before the meteorite hits xx
I know - I'm cringing.
My plan is to leave the country ASAP.
But the good news is that by not replying and by putting up pic of him and his girlfriend, he's helped me to snap out of it! :D
Keep you posted,
Grammar Gal
I blame this on my mother who got into a deep conversation with me about it, claiming that I "broke his heart" so it's only natural that he'd ignore me.
Bullshit!
I didn't break his heart - as Bazz said: he's a guy and he's a prick.
Of course I didn't make this realisation until this morning and now it's too late
Yesterday, moping in self-pity, I sent a message to Knight, which he saw (according to Facebook) and has not replied to. Fuck my life! And now I don't feel sad because I've converted my sadness to mild annoyance verging on a "fuck you" attitude.
This is a good thing, because now I'm feeling soooo much better.
What brought on this realisation? The fact that Knight just put up pictures of him and his girlfriend. And now I realise he's happy with his girlfriend, I don't want him to split from her and I don't want him anymore; I'm sick of chasing someone that's not chasing me!
And, on that note, I'm going to show you the message I sent.
I am cringing as I copy and paste this so don't judge me. Or if you do then pity my foolishness:
I have a theory that in December the world's going to get hit by a massive meteorite sent from aliens and everything's gonna get blown up (unless my tardis starts working or the Japanese make some ships to save us like they do in 2012).
Anyway, in the case that I don't get on one of these ships and we're hit by a meteorite there is something Id like to know or it will just bug me forever: why did you say you loved me, then you ignored me, and then you got a girlfriend? There's no hard feelings don't worry (: I'd just like to know before the meteorite hits xx
I know - I'm cringing.
My plan is to leave the country ASAP.
But the good news is that by not replying and by putting up pic of him and his girlfriend, he's helped me to snap out of it! :D
Keep you posted,
Grammar Gal
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